mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Hippo gnu deer
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
