I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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