Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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