she was so not down for the gang bang
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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