Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize