you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
