Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
