im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
