She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
