She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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