I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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