So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize