Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
