Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore

Fav 1 2226 1006
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.

Fav 9 931 3584
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(315): View more from New York

Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.

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(954): View more from Florida

He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"

(954): View more from Florida

Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.

Fav 15 960 3130
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(502): View more from Kentucky

I think I sharted a yagerbomb.

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(518): View more from New York

She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.

Fav 16 2248 6149
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers

Fav 4 1111 783
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(907): View more from Alaska

Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?

(785): View more from Kansas

Why is that your only point of reference?

(907): View more from Alaska

Just answer the question

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