O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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