great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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