Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
