I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
