Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize
