Non-Jews are for practice
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
