I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
