why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I just want to make out with him forever
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize