What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
