My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
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