Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize