your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
how drunk are you?
Several
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
