well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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