It's Friday. Sex?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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