everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize