I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
