when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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