If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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