We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i just had sex bonerless
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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