It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
