Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
