Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize