We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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