Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
