there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
there is glitter all over my balls
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