I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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