We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
