Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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