Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
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