Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
