I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
