didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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