We won't sleep together?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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