I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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