At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Found your dick twin last night
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
