She announced her abortion via fbk
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize