Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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