It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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